NYX Fix

On a shopping trip to Shoppers Drug Mart, during my lunch break one chilly November day, I discovered something SO wonderful I nearly shrieked out loud.

I went to Shoppers to get a new beauty sponge (one similar to the Beauty Blender but at a fraction of the cost). Anytime I'm in Shoppers it's never just a quick in and out. I always peruse through the makeup aisle to see if anything new has come out. So there I am, venturing down the aisle and I stumble upon the most life changing display. A new NYX eye shadow pallet!! Why is this epic you ask? Because NYX is a makeup brand that is similar to the high end products you would find in Sephora but at drug store prices. NYX is a phenomenal brand and as of right now it is only sold in the States. I literally could not believe my eyes. How did this little thing sneak across the border? It must have been a mistake. A glorious mistake.

When Target graced Canada's presence for half a second, it carried NYX products. Then in a blink of an eye it was taken away. My soul hurt. When the clerk at Shoppers saw my excitement she walked over to me and to my delight explained that NYX will officially be coming to Canada in the New Year and will be featured at Shoppers replacing Almay. Praise be to sweet baby Jesus!! I cannot wait!

Promise me this one thing? Promise me you will check out NYX and I can guarantee you that it will become your new favourite makeup brand.

Check it out at Shoppers Drug Mart early 2016!!

You can thank me later!

XO
Amber

#goals (Part 2)

My new goal?

Loose weight.

To be specific, lose more weight than I ever had lost before. They say someone of my height, 5 ft 8, should weigh within the 150 lb to 165 lb range. So I set my goal for 155 lbs. I knew what it was like to loose weight and then slack off, give up, quit and feel defeated. I wanted to know what it would happen if I didn't quit. I also had my sights set on a mini goal. I had a vacation in 2 months time and I wanted to feel great on this trip. I wanted to look good and feel confident. When I began my journey the scale had crept up to 197 lbs. For my trip I wanted to weigh 180 lbs so I had 17 pounds to lose.

I started with running. I am absolutely a cardio girl and I love running. I love throwing on headphones, cranking the music and running until I'm completely exhausted. Its great, cheap therapy for me. So being that it was summer, I laced up and used the great outdoors as my gym. Incorporating toning exercises after each run session.

I also knew that this time I needed to dramatically change my eating habits. Since my day job was so stationary I knew I had to counteract that with a healthier diet. NO MORE FAST FOOD AND CRAP! Eat to live, not live to eat! I went from eating croissants, muffins and bagels with cream cheese for breakfast or in the alternative skipping breakfast altogether to eating a Greek yogurt and an apple or a spinach omelette. Lunch time became filled with salads, avocado and tomato on an English muffin and all things good for me, instead of the usual fast food run. Dinner was usually chicken, rice and veggies or some variation of that. I started drinking more water than I thought was possible. I still had my morning coffee but opted for a healthier version instead of my usual double double. A diet coke was a rare occasion for me and what I considered a 'treat'. My diet did a complete 180. The first time I decided to 'cheat' was a monumental moment for me. Usually a night of pizza and wine while on a diet or lifestyle change would result in me throwing my hands up and saying well that was fun while it lasted. Game over! I would gain a pound and I would succumb to the idea that this healthy thing just wasn't for me because I was too weak to stick with it. This time around I didn't let one bad meal dictate my future. I ate that pizza and enjoyed that wine and the next day I got up and went to the gym and continued to eat well. Game SO NOT over! I've learned that I have serious issues with food. People ask, are you a salty or sweets kind of person. Honey, I'm both. I could eat a bag of chips and follow that up with a box of cookies. I love food, the bad, the good, all of it!! Realizing that I could enjoy the food I love, i.e Pizza, and that it didn't make me gain 10 pounds made me think differently about food this time around. I couldn't punish myself for eating one unhealthy meal by eating more unhealthy meals. One unhealthy meal won't make you fat just like one salad won't make you skinny. To keep me on the straight and narrow, I made some rules for myself.

1. Never miss a Monday - I made sure, without fail, that I worked out on Monday. It would set the tone for the week.

2. Only consume alcohol on the weekends - I'm not a huge drinker by nature but being that when I started this journey it was summer and we live in our pool, the weekend was the time we spent drinking poolside and entertaining friends. It became something to look forward to.

3. Never eat past 7 pm - This was a big one for me because I love to snack while watching tv at night. I made sure dinner was before 7 pm and no snacking following dinner. This was a hard thing to do, like quitting smoking. I craved a snack at night but eventually there were nights that it didn't even cross my mind.

4. WATER - Lots of it. Water and coffee were the only two beverages I allowed myself to consume
daily. However, water was unlimited.

5. Carbs - Carbs aren't all bad, you need carbs in your diet. However when I say I try to limit carbs to one meal a day, I mean the carbs you get from pasta, rice, bread etc. If I was eating rice at dinner I wasn't going to have any 'carbs' at any other meal that day. I also would have a day once a week where all I would eat was veggies and fruit.

6. Cheat meals - Once a week. You crave it all week? So have it on a Friday! If you don't give in once and a while you will go nuts! Trust me. You will end up doing a drive by at 7 -11 and binging on everything you have ever even thought about eating. Also, if my boyfriend or daughter was eating something that wasn't in my meal plan, usually a bite would be all I needed to get me by.

 

By the time my vacation came around I had surpassed my goal and actually lost 18 pounds. I was so happy. It had been a long time since I had been 179 lbs. Vacation meant all bets were off. I still tried to exercise or do a lot of walking but I allowed myself to eat whatever I wanted. When I returned home I had gained 5 pounds but I was determined to keep going with my weight loss. As time went on I still lost weight but my progress slowed down with each pound I lost. I plateaued for 3 weeks at 173 lbs. It was so frustrating but I wasn't gaining weight so I tried to not stress about it too much. Eventually, I broke the plateau. The second mini goal I set for myself was to get past the 170's. Like I said in my last post I had never been less than 173 lbs in my adult life. Even at age 15 I weighed 173 lbs. The day I stepped on the scale and it read 169 lbs I was beyond happy.

The scale wasn't the only way I was able to see my progress, I also made sure throughout this process that I took measurements of myself. I had an unhealthy addiction to the scale and in the past if I didn't see that number drop I would usually give up. Measuring myself took care of that. Even if the scale wasn't moving, because I could be gaining muscle, the measurements didn't lie.

Today I weigh 168 lbs and am still striving towards my 155 lb goal. I 've lost a total of 29 pounds and 28.5 inches. I went from a size 14 to a size 10 and depending on the item, I can purchase a medium as opposed to a large or extra large. I have also lowered my BMI from 29, which is at the max of the overweight category, to 25 which is the lowest in the overweight category. I'm still in the 'overweight' range but not for long. I joined a gym for the colder months and go 4 - 5 times a week for 45 minutes to an hour and a half, depending on the day. I'd have to say that the best part of this whole process has been the improvement in my daily routine. Before, I was never a morning person. I would snooze my alarm at least 4-5 times in the morning. Now I wake up before my alarm. When I come home at the end of the day I don't crash on the couch. Instead, I have energy to do things like cook a healthy meal or clean or do laundry or more importantly play with M. Sure I still get tired and you can bet that I get excited about a night off from the gym but all in all I love my new life.

It took a long time for my friends and family to notice my progress but that's normal. I'm getting compliments now and people are noticing my hard work. I would like to say I'm happy with my body now but I still have a lot of work to do. I have trouble zones I want to fix but I know I'm getting there. I'm making progress. It may take a full year to get to the point where I can look in the mirror and smile every day at what I see but that day is so worth the weight (pun intended)!

 

My advice to those wanting to make a change? Be realistic. This won't happen overnight and that's okay! Talk about your goals. Make them known so you can hold yourself accountable. Make rules for yourself like I did. Make time for you. I have a daughter, a boyfriend, full time job and a house to maintain but if I don't take care of myself I won't be around for any of those. Where there is a will, there is a way. Don't give up. It will be hard. Probably the hardest thing you'll ever do but I can guarantee you that it's worth it. That moment you go into a store and try on clothes that actually fit keeps you motivated to do better and keep going. When you don't feel like going to the gym, GO! You will be surprised at how much you accomplish when you don't think you have the energy. Trust me, I had days when I dragged my feet, kicking and screaming all the way to the treadmill. When you don't see any progress, lace up your shoes and go work out. Keep going!

One day, in the next few months, I know I will achieve my final goal. I will not quit and I will not stop until I achieve it! And you know what happens after you've achieved your goal? You are left with the task of setting and obtaining a new one....and that my friends is something quite exhilarating.

I can't wait to see what's next!!

**I do not claim to be a fitness and health expert. The above is just my take on my personal weight loss struggles. Consult your physician before adopting any new exercise or eating plan.**

#goals

I had always hoped one day to go back to college and graduate with a diploma. I wanted to feel what achieving that accomplishment would feel like. So when I graduated in June of this year, with Honours, I thought to myself that I had literately fulfilled a goal.  Veni, Vidi, Vici. I came, I saw, I conquered. But you know what happens after you've achieved your goal, you are left with the task of setting and obtaining a new one. It was almost a sadness that fell upon me.

A 'now what?' feeling.

A void.

I had wanted this for so long and now it was mine. Eventually I stopped asking myself 'now what?' and started to ask myself ' what's next?'.

A few weeks following graduation I was working at the job I co-oped for. I was so happy to be out of school, diploma in hand and working in the field I worked so hard to get into. One day I bent down to search through a lower drawer of a filing cabinet and felt and heard my knees make a sound that should only be heard coming from someone over the age of 50. It was a crunching noise. Like my body weight was too much for my knees to bear. Whoa! I was worried. I was disgusted. I was immediately scared that this desk job I so badly wanted to be at was making me unhealthy. I started to evaluate my health. I realized that I was very sedative every day. I heard the tale of the dreaded 'secretary's ass' and this thought ran through my mind regularly. Since I had started at the firm I gained roughly 15 to 17 pounds. I went from working two, very active, jobs to sitting on my ass all day. To boot, I was so exhausted from the mental stress of the job that when I came home I was just done. Pooped. Exhausted. Tired. After dinner, which was usually take out or a quick unhealthy fix, I would crash on the couch and that's where I stayed. I worked hard so I justified my laziness by telling myself I deserved to relax and be still. I also justified my eating habits in the same way, because I deserved it. I deserved that Big Mac or that bowl of chips at 9:00 p.m.

These thoughts of how unhealthy my lifestyle was kept consuming me. I was stuck in a vicious cycle and I was gaining weight at a rapid pace.

To be honest, I've always struggled with my weight. I don't remember a time in my adult life, or even my teenage life, where I didn't weight less than 173 lbs. I've never shopped for clothes in a size less than a large or size 12. I have always been a heavier set individual. Sure, I've lost weight in the past. After having my daughter, I ended up losing 20 pounds and being 15 pounds under my pre baby weight. A year later the scale began to creep up. It was a stressful time and I gained nearly 10 pounds back. At my heaviest, not pregnant, I weighed 216 lbs. At this stage in the game I was back up to 195 lbs and gaining. I knew I needed to do something. So I went back to the gym and started watching what I ate. I started to lose weight. It was at that time that I promised myself I would never get above 200 lbs again...EVER! Fast forward to my break up with M's dad. I was working a lot as a server at a bar and had adopted an intermittent fasting diet. I had weighed 183 lbs when I started my job at the bar and within a few months I was down 12 pounds. I was the best I'd looked since high school, well except that I valued a flat iron and makeup more than I did back then. I had confidence for the first time in a long time. I felt great. I got a second job working at the local Casino as a hostess. My job was walking, walking all day. Then after dating my now boyfriend for a few months the love weight began to pile on. Yes, love weight. You all know what I mean. The weight you gain when you are in a new relationship and are at the comfortable stage in said relationship. The stage when you go out to dinner all the time and eat late at night together. You don't feel the need to dress up but rather comfies are the norm. The thing about comfies is that you don't realize you are gaining weight because of the elasticity in most sweats and hoodies. Needless to say I gained a few pounds. Then I stopped working because I had gone back to school.   Juggling both was not in the cards for me. So for nearly two years I didn't work. Therefore the activity level I was getting from running around at the bar and/or the Casino all the time ceased to exist and since I still had the same poor eating habits my body had no choice but to gain weight. I managed to get back up to 183-185 lbs by the time I was hired at the law firm that I currently work at.

Back to the moment I heard my knees crunch. That was in July of this year. It was then that I realized I had to do something before I was too far gone.

That's when I made a new goal.

Stay tuned for part 2 of this blog...

Tricks and Treats

Halloween this year felt like it came and went. Actually so did the whole month of October. I just spent the last little while tonight, taking down my decorations for the season. All that remains is the enormous amount of Halloween candy. Between what my boyfriend and I purchased for our Halloween party and what M brought home from trick or treating, we have enough to last until Christmas. M is tickled pink, as most kids would be. In fact, from the moment she gets homes from school she asks if she can have something from her treat bag.

Last night was no different. She had a few pieces after dinner. Eventually bed time was upon us and she brushed her teeth and asked if she could watch t.v. for a bit. I obliged with a half an hour time limit in tow. She snuggled up in her bed and I followed her into her room shortly after for bedtime kisses. I noticed she was huddled under her blankets as if something was wrong. Her little eyes peeking up over the covers looked sad. I now realize they were eyes filled with guilt. As I asked her what the matter was and gently rolled her over to talk, I noticed her little cheek stuffed with what I could only guess was chocolate. As mothers instinct had it this little rebel had managed to sneak a treat and try to get away with it. Immediately I escorted her to the trash can where I sternly told her to spit it out, all the while she is crying in hysterics over getting caught red handed. Then I took her to the washroom to brush her teeth, yet again, yes still crying. As you might have guessed she then quickly lost out on tv time. Once she was tucked back into her bed her wimpers weighed on me and I snuggled up beside her. "We'll talk about this tomorrow" I told her. The more I had tried to explain why she was in trouble the louder the crying got. Clearly, parenting at this moment was not in the cards. She calmed down, fell asleep and eventually I snuck out.

I was then met in the kitchen by my boyfriend hiding the bag of candy. Deep down I think he was thinking that M had been banned from the holy grail of candy and the loot was all for him now. Victory was his. He had paid his dues trick or treating for many years and now it was his time to reap the rewards. Just like his parents had done before him and their parents had done before them.

In reality I should have been the one hiding the bag from both M and him. After all bite size candy love is not on the diet plan....unfortunately.